EVERY LITTLE HELPS

How about a special offer from Tesco for those of us middle-aged men who visit the Brigg store but get a bit impatient queuing behind people with masses of family shopping?
Could we have a checkout assigned just to us, on Friday and Saturday evenings when we pop in for a pack of lager, or a few bottles of real ale?
The aim should be to get us grumpy old-ish men through the checkout in a couple of minutes, including time spent in the queue.
I'm talking here about customers who don't want to fiddle around in a pile of cards till they locate the correct Debit one, who don't have any interest in points on a Tesco Card, who have no children young enough to take School Vouchers along to gain a few Brownie points from teacher, who are in no need of cashback, who do not need help with their packing, and haven't the time for a quick chat about something or other.
We would also promise to tender cash in the old-fashioned way!
This is on my wishlist but obviously won't be regarded as a good idea by Tesco. There can't be much profit on their excellent special offer ale (three bottles for four quid!